This Sunday will be the first time I will not wish my dad a Happy Father's Day. He passed away the day after Saint Patrick's this year. I am Dad-less. It is a very odd feeling to say that, but it's true.
Which brings me to another thought. How many people out there who have Dad's that are alive, but dad may as well be dead when it comes to being there for their children.
Thirty years ago or more, being a single mother was a rarity. Maybe one or two kids I went to school with were raised by a single mother. Nowadays with a divorce rate of around 50%, there are definitely alot more children raised in single mother households. Single dads fall into a list of categories. I have listed them below. This list is not definite, nor is it the absolute rule...just more of my observations.
1. The Dead beat Dad. Unfortunately they do exist. Fleeing from financial and emotional responsibility of their kids. Won't pay child support, and if ordered to do so, will claim poverty and work under the table so as not to be on the fiscal revenue radar that is used in the Canadian court system to calculate what he should be paying to his KIDS. Makes zero effort to see his kids, even though there may be a signed custody agreement.Major loser.
2. The Outsider Dad. Sees his kids once every two weeks for the weekend. That's it. Pays child support, but has a tendency to contradict the running of the household where his kids live citing that he has a say in the daily running of the household because he pays, yet does not reap the stress that comes with his autonomous decision making.. Example: Mom says no, dad says yes, mom is the villain, dad is the hero because he said yes. Outsider dad is often seen at shopping malls buying presents and more presents for his kids.
3. The Overindulger Dad. Similiar to the Outsider dad, but doesn't get involved in the day to day stuff. usually is a workaholic and travels alot, so time spent with children is minimal, so he overindulges his kids when he sees them with expensive toys, designer clothes and video games. Does pay child support willingly.
4. 'Mr Mom' Dad. Splits custody at least 50/50 with the mom. If he had his druthers, he would have the kids all of the time. Does the role of the mother and the father (drives kids to activities, involved in the PTA, cooks and cleans) I love Mr Mom's.They may have divorced their wives, but they didn't divorce their kids.
5. My ex husband. Useless.